So bright…

I kind of know that feeling. (Picture from the anime “Laws of Eternity”.)

I think there is a tendency, particularly for us men, to think of ourselves as “brighter”, smarter and more knowledgeable than others. This is usually because we easily forget our own mistakes, or explain them away, thinking that we had a good reason for them, or that someone else caused us to make the mistake, or that it would be unreasonable to expect this or that from us. When it comes to others, it is much simpler. They really are that stupid, or coarse, or lacking in character. Savages or degenerates, barbarian or superstitious, they are just hopeless and can’t be counted on. They are not like us.

So when I notice that almost everyone is ignorant and prefers to stay so, I have to wonder whether I am just caught in the same trap as the rest. Do I simply mistake my own collection of illusions for the Truth, and consider everyone else deluded? Certainly they would think so, and without a trace of doubt. In fact, the trace of doubt is one of the reasons why I feel that I have actually “seen the light” as the saying goes.

The other is that in many cases I have been where they’re hanging, I think I can see how they’re pinned. If I have not gone that far in their direction, I have been far enough to survey the terrain. The Zeitgeist, the spirit of the times, is not something you casually overlook. Even if you have massive help fighting it, you can hardly avoid noticing it.

Also: When you dream, you do not know that you dream. Becoming aware of the dream is the beginning of waking up. Or in another metaphor, if all you know is night and twilight, the twilight may seem to be day. But once the dawn breaks, it is impossible to maintain that illusion anymore.

And the brightness is not one that conveniently shines only on everyone else. It also painfully drives home my own life up to now and various errors and omissions habitual to myself. And perhaps that more than anything makes it hard to write about, because writing is to hold judgment on myself. If I ignore that part, life will make sure to arrest me again.

In other words, I am surrounded by idiots, and so are the people around me. It is just that my foolishness is the opposite of what they think it is, by and large.

Although it is probably tilting at windmills, I am tempted to try to convey some of this brightness. Although today certainly did not do so.


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