When we are children, it is natural that even ordinary events, things that happen to pretty much anyone at some time, make us lose our peace and clarity of mind (if any).
I hope it amuses you as much as it amuses me, when I compare myself to King Solomon, the legendary archetype of the wise ruler. I assure you, this is not something that occupies my mind every day…
But just recently some small thing made me remember a movie about King Solomon. What struck me again, as it did when I first saw it, was how the movie separated the excited, sensual and generally upbeat Song of Songs from the chilling, cynical Ecclesiastes. Both of these are attributed to Solomon, although they may be inspired by him rather than dictated, historians now believe. In the movie, the Song was made during the visit by the Queen of Sheba, whereas the more depressing philosophy came after their parting. This is something common people can relate to, I am sure: When they are lifted up in the air by the whirlwinds of love, their feelings overflow into their thoughts, and likewise when they crash to rock bottom afterwards.
But it is different for people like King Solomon and I. You can compare the average person with a large stream, such as those that ran through the farm where I grew up in western Norway. During sunny summer days these streams were quite small – you could literally step over them – but after a day of rain, they were raging torrents that could sweep with them man and horse if you were careless. Now think of a similar stream, except that somewhere along its course it passes through a lake. When the stream grows to excess, the dam absorbs the shock, so to speak. It takes a lot more to make it go over its banks. Conversely, it takes much more dry weather to make it shrink. This would be people like King Solomon and I.
This was how I thought, that there were only a few people like that, and I happened to be one of them for some reason. Having reflected on myself, I think that is not quite it. Â This should be the natural state of mind in my age, past the middle of an ordinary lifespan. There are unfortunately people, even many people, who remain easily moved by small things: Â A thoughtless insult, being passed over for a promotion, days of rainy weather, even a bad loss for their favorite soccer team. So yeah, there are a lot of people who are not very similar to King Solomon.
And the truth is that I am not quite King Solomon myself. When I suddenly fall ill, it influences my thoughts quite strongly, at least while I am getting worse. And the time I suddenly was without a place to live, I did not exactly have Sabbath in my heart either. So perhaps the river of my feelings just run through a big pond, not the Great Lakes. Â Still, I am glad for what there is. And I am glad I have not been tried beyond my breaking point. It is better if I can find the truth about my self through reflection than having to go through disasters to the brink of death to see myself. Or, perhaps just as bad, having hundreds of wives, like King Solomon.
But I hope you understand that when I write about different topics, they all pass through this big pond. It is not like one day I am only thinking about the weather, then about City of Heroes, then about books of timeless wisdom, then about writing fiction, and so on. Much like Solomon could have worked on the Song of Songs and Ecclesiastes simultaneously, I also simply present different facets of my slowly changing life. Only by the balance and tone of the writing may historians of the future possibly be able to get a realistic picture. But they probably won’t. They may be better off studying King Solomon, even though he did not write an online journal…