Yearly Archives: 2012

Temptation to preach

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The doors to the sixth dimensional Realm of Light are opening

The doors to the sixth-dimensional Realm of Light are opening, in one of my favorite sequences from the anime “The Laws of Eternity”. I have borrowed the terminology from this anime and the corresponding book by Ryuho Okawa, but the actual experience was almost disturbingly familiar when I read about it.

We who feel at home with the 6-dimensional Realm of Light have a tendency to want to lead or guide others. Not because we like to lord it over others, but because they badly need guidance, even ours. A lot of us fall into the general category of “teacher”, even if not necessarily as a job title. Because we have “seen the light” as the saying goes (although to varying degree) we would love to share this with others. That, however, is easier said than done.

When we talk about spiritual matters, it is not in the way of someone who has read books. This applies even if we actually have read books. The reason for this is that when we read books, or in other ways come across some piece of Truth, it resonates with our heart and it is this resonance, which is our own (in a manner of speaking, since all is a gift) which we retain.

The Truth hits us with the force of revelation: a sharp insight, like a bright beam of light, a wow factor. It is not like learning French verbs which you need to repeat until you remember them. It is like finding a missing puzzle piece that, once put in place, stays in place, and changes the picture permanently. It usually fills us with joy, but sometimes it shocks us, or drives us to repentance. It is “really something”. It is active, it changes us. This is how a piece of Truth differs from a piece of fact. The “realm of light” could also be called “realm of truth” in this sense. There is actually much greater and purer Truth further up, as we can see from the saints (who surpass this) but this is probably the level where we start to have these wow experiences repeatedly. So, we could call this the realm of insight, the realm of inspiration, the realm of revelation perhaps.

The theoretical knowledge that contained the “piece of Truth” may even focus on something else, and remains theoretical if we remember it at all. It is the part that resonates that we remember and which remains alive to us. The revelation, to use a religious word. I don’t mean by this that we hear voices and see angels, well most of us don’t. But it hits us with the force of revelation, is what I mean.

It is an absolute conviction, to approximately the same degree that we tend to believe our own eyes. I may concede that it is possible that these things are not real, but I would do so in the same way I may concede that my body is not actually real and I may live in some virtual reality, Matrix-style or otherwise. It is possible in a philosophical sense, but I’ll nevertheless continue to assume that what I perceive as real, really is real.

But still, there is a huge difference between absorbing something through resonance and actual practice. What we can see is a lot more than we can do – or at least that is the case for me. I may have a conviction, and I may have an understanding that is so alive and free that you could wake me up in the night and ask me to speak for five minutes or an hour about the things that belong to the Realm of Light, I believe. I have not actually tested this, but apart from the physical pain of talking (after all these years of mostly silence) it should not be a problem. I should not need a manuscript, or to look up something in a book, or anything except enough water to not lose my voice. This is what I believe, based on how ridiculously easy it is to write and write and write and write about these things.

But I don’t really live the kind of life that a spiritual teacher lives. The Voice in my heart certainly could keep going for a thousand years, is what I believe, but if I were to tell all of that, I would condemn myself by all the un-practiced knowledge. The iceberg would tip over and disaster would ensue. What I should do is hide the words in my heart and let them change me.

But it sure is tempting to preach. I am torn by my urge to say all the words that should be spoken, before they are lost forever. But it is not really my job to teach you everything and remind you of everything. The Voice in your heart will do that. All I should do is resonate on the same wavelength, so as to wake people up to what is already there.

An immense beyond

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A breakthrough of LightAn immense Beyond will one day burst forth and absorb the universe?

I want to share a quote from Frithjof Schuon. It is eerily double in its meaning. Perhaps you don’t find it as spine-tingling as I do, but let’s give it a try:

Our world is but a furtive and almost accidental coagulation of an immense beyond, which one day will burst forth and into which the terrestrial world will be reabsorbed when it has completed its cycle of material coagulation.

Schuon means this in a metaphysical sense; that is his area of expertise, after all. But lately, theoretical cosmologists have come to almost exactly the same description of the physical universe.

You are no doubt familiar with the “Big Bang” hypothesis about the origin of our universe. But what has gained less attention is the “cosmic inflation scenario”. In this, which is our best approximation to facts so far, the Big Bang was not actually the start of our universe. Well, it was a prerequisite for it, but the energy (for lack of a better word) of the Big Bang is not contained within our known universe. Rather, our universe appeared as a bubble of “false vacuum”, most likely one of a myriad such bubbles (although we will never be able to know, since we cannot see beyond our bubble).

Yes, what became our universe was simply a bubble in the stream that flowed from the Big Bang, a limited area that was filled with fields of potential – protoenergy, perhaps we could call it – which later coagulated into matter and energy as we know them today. The current laws of nature did not appear until this bubble universe coalesced from a field-filled bubble into actual space, time, matter and energy. (And dark matter and dark energy, presumably, about which we only know that they probably exist, not what they are.)

According to this theory, it is more probable than not that an enormous number of “universes” exist, with a varying number of dimensions, with and without matter and energy as we know them or some other waves and particles that may have a similar relation to each other as our energy and matter have in our known universe. If these universes don’t share any forces or particles that interact with ours, they could occupy the same space and time and we would never know. Of course, it is not obvious that they have space and time at all, they could have completely different dimensions.

According to the same theory, it is not at all obvious that our configuration is the most stable. If it is not, then elementary particles will eventually decay and the universe will evaporate. Or another universe might burst into ours and engulf ours, triggering a change in our natural laws that would make the universe spontaneously change into a different configuration. There is no particular reason why matter and energy should continue to exist indefinitely. There is however an extremely high probability that they will do so for many millions and even billions of years yet, so this is not exactly something scientists lose sleep over.

***

Atheists generally assume that consciousness is a more or less accidental function of matter and energy. Schuon, on the other hand, holds the opposite to be true: Consciousness is pervasive, the form it takes is accidental. In our universe, consciousness settles in certain configurations of atoms, but this could not have happened unless the universe was already permeated by consciousness. Much like energy and matter cannot be created or destroyed by natural processes, information theory says that information can also not be created or destroyed, only transformed. It is then no big leap of faith to assume the same for consciousness, as the next step up from matter – energy – information. Well, for metaphysicists it is not; for physicists, it may be too big a leap, perhaps.

But in any case, regardless of whether we will be around in some form to witness the end of the universe, it is still an amazing thing to speculate about. In a manner of speaking, our mind is already present at the Big Bang through the power of our imagination. If we were to know enough about the end of the universe, we would in a manner of speaking be able to “fore-see” it with our mind’s eye. The human mind, as I have said before, is not bound tightly to the flow of time. We constantly make jumps backward in time (memory) or forward (anticipation), showing that we ourselves belong to a higher dimension than the fourth dimension of time. If not, we could not traverse it with our mind.

This fifth dimension, through which we can break “the fourth wall”, is itself part of the immense beyond. So it seems likely, in a way, that the end of the universe need not be the end of consciousness. That said, most of us would probably prefer to stay in this “coagulated” universe as long as possible. ^_^

Wrote fiction today

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I wrote a short story today, and was in fact planning to upload it as today’s entry. But I decided against it. I always try to write the truth, a lot of truth and nothing but the truth, or when I write about fiction, it is the actual creative process and not the finished (?) story.

Besides, it was more realistic sounding than much of what I write that is actually true, so that might cause some confusion. Disclaimers are nice and all, but after a while they may be forgotten while stories remain.

If it becomes a habit, perhaps I will make a third journal for my fiction. ^_^

Everyone else too

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“I have trouble talking to people who look like they have friends” says this girl. Not all pains or disabilities are visible on the body.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” I was surprised to see this attributed to Plato, and by all accounts this is just a way to add authority to it. It is not much over a century old. But the idea itself has certainly been true since Plato and before. It is also a fundamental tenet in Buddhism, although not a direct quote there.

If we look at it simply, we can say that people experience suffering from their body, from their mind, and from their relationship with other people. It is rare to meet anyone who does not have at least two of these three more or less constantly, or at least frequently. Some carry all three of these burdens at the same time.

Even if you do not see a person wince in pain, chances are they still have their afflictions. And if not directly painful, then certainly limiting. Some weakness of the body, or some phobia, or some obligation to a family member, may keep one from the path in life that they have always been longing for. You cannot see such a thing and will not hear about it unless you learn to know them well, perhaps. But these things are very common even among those who seem successful.

Of course there are differences, and some people are simply luckier. But it is not easy to know which. It is not always those who complain the most who carry the heaviest burden, far from it.

We should understand that everyone else too is carrying a burden, and cut them some slack at the least, if we cannot help them. Unfortunately people will sometimes lash out, not knowing the other person, adding insult to injury and salting the wounds. Sometimes we may have to act to protect one person from another, to stop an injustice, but to attack simply because we are irritated or upset is not a good thing.

One of the things I have learned from Happy Science is to notice this, that illness tends to make us self-centered. If we experience pain, the first thing we drop is helping others. This is not in itself evil, for we also have an obligation to look after our own body. If we let it continue to grow sicker because we exert ourselves, we will soon be unable to even care for ourselves, even when we otherwise could have done so. But there is a seductive side to this being excused from our duties. It is something we can get addicted to, and make use of more than is right. It may even turn into a subconscious desire to fall ill, for those who are weary of their duties and wish to relax. So that is something to be aware of.

Of course I am thinking of my own recent experiences when I say this. We each have to look out for our own tendencies and temptations first and foremost.

But even those who don’t write about it on the Net, have their struggles. Let us be kind, let us be merciful. Would we not hope to meet that kind of good will ourselves on our day of need?

A dream

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This morning, somewhere around half past six, I had a dream that made an emotional impact on me.

In my dream, I was my character from City of Heroes, the violet Color of Reverence. However, the dream took place in Daggerfall, the mythical magic-filled land of my first long-time game environment. The inhabitants of the village or small town had become outspoken in their criticism of the Establishment, and the government had sent the guards – the medieval police with extreme prejudice – to teach them a lesson. I caught a couple of them as they were about to kill a defenseless woman and two children (I am somewhat uncertain whether this was my family in the dream or a neighbor). Their activities came to a stop, let us say.

It really bothered me, in my dream, that the government had gone to this length to protect the economic elite of Daggerfall. I woke up with a feeling that this was somehow important, but the feeling itself is gone now.

Fooled by an old trick

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Hero?

My main character of the weekend, Color of Reverence. No points for seeing a theme here.

No, I did not bite on a Nigeria scam. It is much more trivial than that, barely noticeable. But I need to learn from small things. Despite my lofty aspirations, I still make mistakes. And as St Teresa says, God preserve us from excusing ourselves with “I am no saint”. (She admits in her Way of Perfection that she used to say that before. Of course, by the time she wrote this, she probably already was a saint…)

Me, I am not a saint (except in the most generic sense, as synonym for God’s people, if even that.) Nor am I a hero, but I play one on the Internet. And that’s where I made my mistake, which I think may be instructive for others too.

I joined the online superhero game City of Heroes during its closed beta, a great honor in my view, and played it probably literally every week for about 7 years. Usually more than once a week too. No exception for vacations (but then I don’t actually travel during my vacations, I write). It is only the last year or perhaps even less that the game has begun to gradually fade from my life, like so many other things do eventually.

It is a good game, too. I don’t mean just in value of production, but in production of value. You take on the role of a hero with slightly superhuman powers, and defeat criminals, protect the innocent (and sometimes the not quite innocent, when they need it) and gradually grow more powerful and famous over the course of this practice. So it kind of reinforces traditional values.  In the words of one of the scripted bystanders on the streets of Paragon City: “Forget those postmodernist deconstructionists! Itland is a real hero, plain and simple.” OK, the “simple” part may not be my favorite, but still.

Now as my life is moving toward its final exam (not that I am in the least hurry!!), I find a little less time for gaming than I used to. And that means my visits to City of Heroes have been quite irregular and mostly short. This suits me: When I play the same game for too long, I become kind of immersed in it and it begins to invade my real life with flashback moments and such distractions. And generally a feeling of emptiness after hours of playing. I don’t want that to happen.

But this weekend was double XP weekend, in which the rewards of virtue are doubled – both the experience points and the influence. So this makes it easy to make rapid progress on a character. I took advantage of this and played a lot this weekend.

I did not ask myself seriously why I would want to make rapid progress in a game I now only play sporadically. It is not like I actually need to do that. The fact that there was a reward took precedence over the fact that I did not need the reward.

This is really the same motivation that makes a lot of women go wild when there are sales. If things are on sale, they temporarily forget that they don’t actually need (and perhaps not even want) the thing. “But it was on sale!”

A voice in my head says something similar exists for sexual temptations. Perhaps it is a general human trait. Certainly it combines with greed to make a good scam. The typical Nigeria scam is based on the notion that this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Once you start getting one each week, they are a lot less tempting. ^_^

So I ask my heart to learn from this mistake, although it would have been better to learn without mistake. At least you can learn from mine!